The ASD Cafe

I was out to dinner with some friends and owing to their various handicaps I assisted with getting their orders filled. friend Martha, recovering from ankle surgery, thought I'd make a good waitress. 

"With my Aspergers and poor social skills? I doubt it. I would last precisely five minutes until someone complained and I would tell them to f- off." I don't react well to difficult customers. Then I wondered. What would a restaurant full of autistics be like?

In one corner there would be a table of  people not uttering a word. In the other would be a table of people all talking loudly, at once. The staff  would mostly stand around staring into space while the cook obsessively cleaned the grill. One of the waiters never writes anything down because he can remember everyone's order- from the last three weeks., while the waitress has a full blown melt down about every ten minutes over the slightest mistake. 

It certainly would be a new dining experience.

Some Insights to Look Into About ASD.

By Alisa McLaughlin

I present for your reading pleasure and education ( not to mention a good dose of congratulating) several links on the subject near and dear to you gentle reader. It makes for fascinating reading.

First up is the problem of employment or rather where the autistic is an improvement on the average applicant.
"When asked why an employer should hire an autistic person in the first place, Sonne says that their assets are obvious. 'People with Asperger's can concentrate better. They are more precise,' he says."

Autistics are also making the world a better place.
"More than two decades later, the socio-cultural landscape surrounding autism has shifted. The rising acceptance of neurodiversity has represented a seminal cultural adjustment in the early parts of the 21st century."

 In unsurprising news is the discovery that autistics are wired differently.
" 'This review highlights that autism should not only be seen as a condition with behavioural difficulties, but should also be associated with particular skill,' said Dr Christine Ecker from the Institute of Psychiatry at Kings College, London."

Creativity and eccentricity are common in artists. It plays a big role with ASD folks as well.  Science have caught up with the obvious.
"creativity and eccentricity often go hand in hand, and researchers now believe that both traits may be a result of how the brain filters incoming information. "

 Genius has its downside and a lot of it has to do with genetic evolution.

"The same evolutionary mechanisms that may have gifted our species with amazing cognitive abilities have also made us more susceptible to psychiatric disorders such as autism."

The more the autism spectrum is studied, the more we realize that it's not a weird, rare thing but merely a commonplace change in humanity. We are the new normal.

Me and my traumatic life despite Asperger's

As an individual on the Autism spectrum, I am honored to have accepted the Chapter Representative (Lane County Region) position.  As a representative, I plan to make the most of this position both in the support and education sector and the advocacy sector. As part of the support sector, I have great desire to share my experiences and advice for others on the autism spectrum wherever possible. I have probably been through more in my life than most on the spectrum and would be an excellent individual to speak at yours and other functions.

BACKGROUND

I have lead a rather traumatic life for a person on the spectrum. When I was around 3 my paternal grandmother was hospitalized for a severe stroke. When I was about 7 or 8, I walked in one day to invite my maternal grandmother  to lunch with my mother and I and caught my maternal grandmother in the middle of heart failure. In the later 80s or early 90s my maternal grandfather was diagnosed with prostate cancer. On the evening of my mother’s birthday in 1990, my dad was hospitalized with severe chest pains and had to have open heart surgery. Shortly thereafter, my paternal grandmother had two more strokes, along with dementia, causing her to be hospitalized and eventually put in a care home. In September of 1994, my maternal grandmother passed away. She had an aortic aneurism which apparently either moved to her brain or ruptured her aorta. She also had previously suffered a small stroke, and suffered from lung cancer, and emphysema. I had also been with her in the previous few years when she broke her hip and I temporarily looked after her. In December of 1995, my other grandmother, my father’s mother passed away. In Spring of 1995, my mother was diagnosed with inoperable lung cancer. She was lucky to have been able to see me graduate high school. It metastasized to her brain and she died five months after I graduated in November (on the 27^th, the day after Thanksgiving) of 1996. She had been given six months, but unfortunately only got a month and a half. Throught all his horror, I also endured the horror of bullying and questions at school.  On April 30 (Easter), 1997 my maternal grandfather passed away from his cancer. My mother had made me executor of his will if something happened to her in order to keep my uncle from taking away my inheritance, as he unfortunately did after my mother’s death. My cousin is giving me things she gets every now and then and wants to give me my grandmother’s china cabinet, even though I deserve so much more since I was his and my grandmother’s last and favorite grandchild. This put strain on me because it was sheer theft on my uncles part. We could not fight it because it had a sentence in it preventing this which we were told was good in Oregon. But I would still do something if I could even though the statute of limitations has run out.  In October of this same year, my paternal grandfather passed away from massive heart disease. Shortly thereafter, my father endured four hip surgeries and suffered another heart attack. He is still living thankfully. However, he is my only remaining family member. He is currently in poor health and I fear losing him as I will be alone, scared and have the overwhelming responsibility of his funeral, burial, and his estate, should something happen to him. This trauma has triggered nearly unbearable anxiety and depression including heart palpitations, constant shortness of breath, daily crying spells, bipolar behaviors, chronic aches and pains, eye inflammation, infections, and binge eating. This anxiety and depression have spawned years (since I was about 19 years of age). This was part of the reason I also put a halt on college at that time. Even though I had a decade of not caring about myself and I let myself go physically a lot, I kept a positive frame of mind.

But I continued to stay strong as a rock, thinking positive with a determination not even the entire Vatican could break up! In the fall of 2006, I went back to school and finished my associate degree in the Spring of 2009. In 2009, I started working with Full Access (now Mentor Oregon, now that I’m in Eugene and Full Access is full) and have been lucky to have had really great care providers who got me started on the road to recovery and caring more about myself, though I believe this will be easier when I’m no longer obese. I am also on the road to obtaining my bachelor’s degree in German with a minor in Psychology at the University of Oregon.  This is the reason I moved to Eugene. I touched many in my hometown of Bend, mostly those I have worked with as well as my educators. My former mentor at Central Oregon Resources For Independent Living loves watching my brain work. Back in high school my German teacher was amazed by my efforts, perseverance, and dogged persuit, he allowed me to coordinate the Germans visit that year since the gal who hosted me [when our class visited Germany for a month the previous Summer]. My senior year he had moved away from the area which partly caused some depression as well. I also earned many school awards including being featured in Who’s Who Among American High School Students, which includes brief biographies and photos of five percent of the countries most successful students who are recommended by educators and schools. I also have a letter in bowling. From about 2000 to 2003, I served as Secretary for three terms as well as news and web editor/manager for Central Oregon Street Rod Association. Last fall, I sacrificed a 1,000 square foot townhouse I was renting for around $237/month for  a 450 square-foot one-bedroom place in Thurston just so I could attend the University, and I started class just two days after moving to the area. I’m planning to move to Eugene in the fall and I’m also now a chapter representative for the Autism of Society of Oregon. I can sense myself moving further and further up the road to success.

MY GOALS

I want to continue to advocate for autism and those with disabilities until we have complete fair rights and treatment both nationally and internationally, including speaking around the globe and nationwide. I am also a successful language student entering my eighth year of German and four years each of French and Spanish (these are rusty), and just begun teaching myself  Italian. The computer is another  one of my talents. I have been using one since I was nine years of age, when we played games in school on the old Apple computers of the 80s. From there I gained knowledge from the very first version of Microsoft Word on up to what we have now.  I also experienced the beginning of and the boom of the internet. My desire is to work and live, and even possibly go to school abroad in Germany. So, I think something abroad with Microsoft would be cool, so long as I could get SQL and Programming training. I already know how to build websites, etc. And in school, I plan to obtain my masters degree and PhD. I am extremely ambitious, and I think the drive came from my mother who always taught me that “can’t” can’t do anything, so I was always taught “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.” She believed in me more than anyone on this Earth. When early educators threatened to place me in ERC classes, my mom refused to let them. She knew I didn’t need these and that I would be greatly successful. She loved me more than life itself.  My German teacher persuaded me to go on because he saw in me an uncanny talent of languages. He was such a warm, fun-loving guy who thought the world of me and we became close friends. He composed a two or three page letter of recommendation for me and soon after moved away. Ever since this time, I have taken this great encouragement with me everywhere.

SPEAKINGS:

1.    Trauma-How to make it through hard times and keep your sanity with autism

a.  Keep a positive outlook. Never give up. Try to take a deep breath and repeatedly remind yourself that everything will be okay. Set Goals For yourself, put your heart into what you love and go for those goals. Don’t even think about hurting yourself. A friend of mine threatened to do this. I called the police and saved her life. The Deputy assured me she was being taken to the hospital and with some additional help, she’s been better ever since. As a matter of fact she was a silver medalist and double bronze medalist at this year’s Special Olympic Games (nationals). She has also had two regional gold medals! Nobody threatens their life in front of me. I WILL CALL 911.  

b.  Be sure you have great support. My friend used to think no one cared about her and lived with a “whatever” kind of attitude. Don’t do this. People care you just have to make yourself get out there and meet them. And great relationships and friendships can happen when you least expect them. Whether it be a care provider, a parent, an educator or a close friend, be sure you have someone you can turn to when you need to help and who will keep helping you until the mission is accomplished! When we moved to Oregon when I was five years old, I had only had preschool. When I turned six, I was put in first grade without any kindergarten. My teacher noticed me playing with my glue, etc. And when I would go out after school and ask my mom if I had to go to school the next day, I would vomit from relief if she said no. This tells you how stressful it was for me. I even choked on my own vomit in the car once!  I could do the work but was not emotionally ready for first grade quite yet. Well the teachers thought I needed ERC classes. This is where mom came in. She told them, “No way! Not my daughter. She’s too smart for that. “  She had believed in me from the beginning always persuading me to think “I can” and  drove it into my brain that “Can’t” can’t do anything! She helped out with my homework when I needed it as well. I could consult her about anything. My elementary and secondary educators knew me as being a good students who was always helpful and also through my mother who was always the room mother at our school, doing parties and stuff for my class and for the school. She was a PTA co-president for a while. She felt helpless if she wasn’t doing something. My mother was always a work-a-holic. She truly loved it. My German teacher was one who inspired me to go on with my languages and would, upon wishing me luck, tell me I probably didn’t need it anyway, I was so with it! When I entered VR some years later to find employment I had two great women who could read me like a book and hired a behavioral therapist to help with daily housekeeping and hygiene as well as diet and nutrition. Well, this therapist read me perhaps even better than my VR ladies and I learned a lot from her. She came up with the idea to place me on Full Access Brokerage. They help the client (myself) hire individuals who are much like behavioral therapists, called care providers, They help you to take care of you home and you hygiene as well as help get you out and about doing things in the community, exercising. They also have helped me with grocery shopping, cooking and nutrition. My last provider in Central Oregon also aided in my move over here to Eugene. She spent a few days helping pack, clean up my place for the new tenants, and came over here with us, her and her husband to help me move in and unpack. I have been on the brokerage since Spring of 2009. This process has certain requirements for consideration and placement and after three tries my first behavioral therapist managed to get me on. Now I want to do this for a friend of mine who is unable to get on. And I hope to advocate so that these requirements are far less complex in the future.

c.  Therapy Pets. Therapy pets, especially cats (if one is not allergic) also help calm you down when you need it.

d.  Go about things yourself. I know it’s hard for some people but that is what your support is for. I was persuaded by a social worker of mine whose husband was the president of the college I graduated from, to go back to school. So I managed to apply for and obtain my own financial aid and went back. I also took it upon myself to get affiliated within the community and with the ASO. Do it via email if it makes you feel better than by phone. Or send in your form and/or write to them. Get to know and help your community. If you need help ask others to help. You’d be surprised at the results!

e.  Take classes and workshops. I just completed a healthy lifestyles workshop, which helps you learn how to heat healthy, what to eat and about having a healthy social life as well. You  can also get into Jewelry making, music, whatever fits your fancy. These give you something to do and are fun at the same time. And you gain those friendships I was just talking about. Autism camps are another fun activity. We do the Kindtree camp every year on the Oregon coast.

2.    School Teasing and Bullying as well as Educator Abuse and Descirimination

a.  Early intervention is a must. Take the time to learn about your child’s condition and get involved. Educate their teachers and their school on the condition. This includes the students. Get an assembly together if you must. When I was in school, no one knew about autism because it wasn’t as great as it is today. And forget about AS, because nobody knew about it until 1994 at least. I always rocked and hand flapped. Other kids always repeatedly asked me why and all I could tell them was that it was “a habit”. I didn’t even know what it was. When I was a toddler I was told it was vestibular disfunction, which turned out to not be true. It was in fact “stimming” or venting my hyperactivity and anxiety, as I would later learn after I was diagnosed with PDD NOS at 17 and AS at 21 because I didn’t have any verbal delay and had “autistic tendencies and other issues. Had we known more about autism and had it been more in the spotlight back then, I could have educated our schools and my outcome may have been much different. I also had speech therapy which surprises people, because my speech sounds great. I could look at a picture of a mannequin and literally tell the speech therapist it was a mannequin. This amazed her. I also amazed everyone with my spelling for that matter. I could spell words like “precaution” in the third grade at age nine. Plus I was lucky to have teachers who helped me understand what I didn’t understand. Don’t hesitate to ask for extended test and paper times either. If preschool, kindergarten, or elementary, speak directly to the childs teacher, if this gets you nowhere, go to the principle if nowhere, go to the superintendent, and if you are still nowhere change school districts if possible. In middle school and high school, have your child and/or yourself speak to the counselor. However, in college don’t ask the teacher directly make sure you get a disability letter from your disabilities director you working with and ask them to help you get whatever you need to be successful. The longer you carry out your intervention streak, the better off you are.

b.  Bullies: I have endured a lot of name calling and teasing because of my rocking, handflapping, picking my nose, and my weight. In elementary school, kids used to make me repeatedly tell them that my boogers were good. In middle school, I used to get my locker door slammed shut on me all the time. In seventh grade I had the worst joke played on me. I was heavily into a singing group that was going out then and people didn’t like them. I got a prank phone call that I’d won tickets to this groups function and fell for it. Nothing could be done because we didn’t know who played the prank, or whose I idea it was. Now, looking back I wish we would have had the call traced and reported it to the school, but my parents did think it was serious apparently.  I felt so humiliated and so hurt. My other bully was a kid who used to get on me all the time about my weight. I was taught to eventually protect myself by saying “I may be able to lose weight, but you’ll never grow a brain.” Learn ways to stand up for and protect yourself.

c.  Tummy Troubles: I used to not go for weeks and then I would go, but one time I vomited what I think was incompletely digested fecal matter, but in school I used to get diarrhea a lot and I remember having a bowel movement once and during get getting paged to go to my bus.

3.    Employment

a.  Obtaining suitable employment has not been easy for me. My first job was at a grocery store, and I was let go after only five days of my position. It is my belief that my supervisor was a stuck-up to her boss, and I was not given the proper amount of time to learn my job. Due to my AS, I was slow in the beginning but would have picked up over time. My second job was at a fast food place for a couple months. I quit because they had me down to working only one day a week. The reason was not clear. After this I worked as a cold-caller for four months, and again I had to quit before being let go. They would not accommodate me so I could do my job properly, so again I quit before getting fired. After this I was at a thrift store for a few months, where it was too much commotion for me to concentrate on the sales floor part of the job. The cashiering wasn’t bad, but I had light struggles there also. So, once again, I quit before getting let go. My longest job was at a bulk mail company where I lasted four years but only because my employer only tolerated me because he “needed the work done for the money”. He would bite my head off and blame me for stuff that was not my fault. It was okay in the beginning, but got to the point where, for example, if he bought lunch out, I would get the refrigerated messy burger that was left over. He promised to help me eat healthier when he’d order lunch for everybody, but then wouldn’t let me because I wasn’t his family (even though I was treated more like his stubborn kid than his employee, which isn’t right.). When he’d leave the office to go out of town, co-workers were asked to keep an eye on me and then report on me when he got back. I was asked to constantly take out the garbage before I eventually quit. I was never told I would be doing this upon being hired. Everybody got nice furniture except for me because I was not “full-time”. I believe he drove me to quitting before he fired me as well. He was just as excited as I was that I was leaving, or so it seemed. By the time I tried to take action on it, no one would help me and I couldn’t get a hold of BOLI to see if there was a statue of limitations for this since I have a disability and this is a violation of the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA). Employment seems to be difficult here in Oregon, which bears serious repair. My last job was at a software building company and only lasted a week because they could not train me properly. Even though it didn’t have to do with my disability really, it is part of my employment struggles.

Through my experiences, I have learned that as a person with a disability you have to keep going on your journey and keep trying to find those people who truly care and keep doing the best you can to survive and be successful. Because the right people are out there, even though they may be more difficult to find or may take a little longer to find than for a neurotypical person. So we should never give up, ever. I will never give up or give up hope and faith.

An Open Letter to NeuroNormals

By Alisa McLaughlin

Dear Neuro Normals,

Autism has been around a long time, it's only recently that scientist "discovered" it. Dr. Eugene Bleuler coined the term c. 1912 to describe certain cases of schizophrenics. Leo Kanner later used the term to describe a group of children who were withdrawn. In the 1940's Hans Asperger noticed similar characteristics in a group of children he was studying. Then came the BS theories that blamed "cold  impersonal mothers" (they always blame the mothers) and treatments that involved LSD and electroshock therapy. 

Autistics are not just catatonic rocking, arm flapping head cases- an image truly frightening to everyone-  or freakishly clever like Rainman. We are often quite capable of appearing perfectly normal thank you. It's a disease the experts said, er wait a mental illness no, it's a "neurological condition". Nothing to worry about like a speech impediment or being left handed. Nevertheless parents were told that because of our poor "social interaction skills" we would never be "normal" and thus a source of anguish or pity from the experts. Please.

The obsession with curing it or assigning blame- lately it's drugs, the environment, or defective genes-has a certain ASD intensity to it I must say. The truth is no one really knows what makes someone autistic. Still everyone reacts to the diagnosis as if the autistic has a third eye in the middle of their forehead or an extra arm. 

You just don't understand, there's nothing wrong with us, we're just different. A concept that seems hard for general society to grasp. Do you know how hard it is for us to "fit in" to please you? Instead of something to overcome or cure why not embrace us as the next step in evolution. Embrace the difference instead of running away or burying it. Did you think we wouldn't notice when we are treated like an aberration? Of course anyone with ASD was obviously out of touch with the world. Did anyone ever ever ask us how we feel about the condition?We're OK with ASD maybe you're the ones that need to adjust.

Those with ASD are in esteemed company from Beethoven, Mozart to Bela Bartok. Sir Isaac Newton had Aspergers' written all over him. Scientists Alan Turing, Albert Einstein and physicist Paul Dirac (who was a textbook autistic) were celebrated for their brilliant minds. We're not going away so enjoy our exceptional perspectives and stop trying to fix us. 

Thank you.

Sensory processing disorder

Here is an article about sensory processing disorder Autist tend to have sensory processing problem and some are more affected then others and not just Autist can have it but people with other disability's can get it or even those without a disability can have it maybe even just a person with a learning problem can have it and not have any other disability. A lot of times a person has trouble learning and there brain has a harder time taking in info there brain doesn't process info as well there brain tends to be like a traffic jam same with Autist and so on well example if your in a big meeting with lots of people and your trying to understand what everyone is saying but can't because there are to many talking that can be frustrating well imagine your brain like that you go to school and your teacher is teaching something but you can't make sense of it because your brains wiring is a traffic jam the whirring doesn't fire right or imagine going to a place with lots of noise your ears hurt from the noise because your brain isn't giving right singles or to much single its just so frustrating for those.


Well here is an article on how we can be able to better notice this in are child and how it can be diagnosed and so on just click below. 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/10/children-sensory-issues_n_1506341.html?ref=fb&src=sp&mimi=1&comm_ref=false#es_share_ended

In and Out of My World By: Lorna Wynn

In and Out of My World
By: Lorna Wynn

She was once a little girl in her own little world
A lot she was dealing with, but never was she feeling with
She was there but, often time’s didn’t care
She appeared normally, but her emotions were twisted up abnormally.
In her room she would be in worlds only she could see.
In her security bubble, she would cuddle.
She remembers feeling some, but mainly felt numb.
She was a girl that held in.
She felt she could never begin.
To others she could never trust but she thought she must.
People she thought she could approve of but often thought herself disapproved of.
As her adulthood progressed she had feelings she began to express.
With her wings she could spread above, as though she were a dove.
Now more with Jesus she could walk and someone with whom she could talk.
In this world she knows she will morn but in Gods eyes she is reborn.
With God she will grow strong as she loves her life long.
To others she is learning to love as God helps her from above
She is ready everyday to bear the cross
And to be lost she doesn’t have to be
This is I…In my own world, but with God I learn about his world.

I love Lucy

I love the show I Love Lucy i have seen every episode its my most favorite Lucy is so funny also i have seen other stuff with her in it such as the movie long Long Trailer among her movies I've seen I've also seen her in a show called The Lucy Show shes wonderful she passed away in the 80s i was born in 86 so she has not been alive as i have been growing up shame cause boy if she was alive i would have gone to meet her whatever i had to do to meet her i would do it well i would have to go to Jamestown New York to meet her where she is from i still do want to go to Jamestown someday just to be in her hometown and see stuff they have to remember her by plus i would love to go to New York anyhow well PS hope you have enjoyed my blogs so far as i enjoy doing them.

Music

I love music i love just about every genre of music if its a song I'm hearing for the first time and then hear a few times more after you bet i will probably like it well i have been in choir from first grade til 11TH grade and then did karaoke when my mom met a guy who did karaoke and my mom loves music to she has played it as i was growing up and i came to enjoy it plus its in my blood well here is a song i like called Time Bomb by 311 among all the music i enjoy just click below to hear.Oh and sorry for any fowl language that is in the song if you don't like that just go ahead and leave the video thanks. 

http://youtu.be/-CmYTWKpqXE

The Next Step in Evolution

"There has been a threefold increase in autism diagnoses in California's Silicon Valley over the last decade. . . . This suggests that evolution is actively selecting autistic genes because they are of substantial benefit to modern society"  - Michael Barton, author, scientist, autistic.

I rather suspected this myself . The reason for the increase in autism is unknown as is the cause . Maybe it is the latest evolutionary step in a society that favors logic over intuition, reason over emotionalism. Look how everyone is preoccupied with their cellphones, blackberries, ipods etc. too engrossed to engage others in conversation. We're way ahead of you on staying focused and obsessed on a subject. Only recently has society taken advantage of the peculiar skills of autistics instead of just focusing on a cure. While scientists clinically look into the growing  phenomena;  the autistic wonders what all the fuss is about. The current theory suggest that the condition is combination of genetics and environment, which is far more reasonable than blaming a single culprit such as vaccines or parent/child interaction. While the neuronormals may be uncomfortable with the idea that autism is here to stay, Many autistics may feel like they are just fine the way they are and maybe it’s society that needs to adjust.

Kindtree

I like kindtree it helps those with Autism to be noticed when they other wise may not be people learn a lot about Autism threw kindtree witch helps them appreciate and except those with Autism they see there talent and they really like it they don't put them down or shy away from what they can do they see that they are very capable in a lot of  ways kindtree also helps those with Autism to get out there and meat others just like them and to do things out in the community and be them self  they can do things without being made fun of and so on its a great organization and I'm glad the guy my mom was with did karaoke for kindtree because of that i got to get involved in a wonderful thing i have Autism and glad for what kindtree dose.

Rainbow Sky

Thoughts on color

By Mary-Minn Sirag
http://www.kindtree.org/marketplace/artists/mary-minn-sirag 

      Why do paint sets have so many browns and grays and so few colors that when mixed add up to a third brilliant color? It’s all too frustratingly easy to brown up a color. I crave the brilliant, saturated colors that don’t dim out into flat pastels when they dry, and that mix into a third pure and brilliant saturated color that glows from without and within.

In 4-color printing, the primary colors are magenta, cyan, yellow ("yelo") and black. All colors are mixtures—for instance, pure red is 50% yellow and 50% magenta. Paler, less saturated colors are percentage screens–for instance, a pink would be a smaller but equal percentage of magenta and yellow—say 20/20.

From magenta and cyan you can get regal purples, which is not only the most difficult color—at least for me—to create from scratch, but also the rarest color in any paint set. Not fair at all!

With pigment, it’s a little different. For me, magenta remains pivotal. Most reds contain too much yellow to mix into a pure purple without browning up sadly. In pigment, cyan translates roughly into turquoise-teal pigment, which contains too much yellow. Cobalt blue is the purest, with no red in it to brown up a luminous green, or yellows to brown up the purples. Lemon glows by itself and plays best with other colors, as well. Most of the time, though, I’m lazy and end up forking out for a tube or half-pan of the pigment color I want—especially when it comes to those brilliant greens and purples.

Looking Up At Mt. Fuji After the Great Tsunami

I’m doing watercolors lately. They’re portable, convenient, easy to clean up; immediate, with fast results. I don’t need more than half a 4’ x 6’ table to lay out my Yarka Original, Expanded and Sequel sets and my Windsor Newton Rose Madder and Cerulean Blue. I don’t mess around with student-grade watercolors or paper. If I do, the colors aren’t brilliant and they puddle, even more than they already do under the not so firm tutelage of my brush. (I haven’t quite figured out good brushes yet.)

I dirty up water licketty split, so I keep two small paint buckets full of clean water at my side so as not to be refilling my water every five minutes. I do the first brush cleaning in one bucket and then the more refined cleaning in the second one. That way, I’m changing only the first frequently. The second one stays clear longer than if I were to use the first until it muddies up and then move on to the second. 

When I complained to a gentleman working at Oregon Art Supply a while ago about how cakey some of my once brilliant and easily mixed Sennelier and Windsor watercolors have become, he clued me in that they have been bought out by another company. So it’s not just me being a pea princess. I felt vindicated.

He pointed me to some lovely David R. Daniel paints but I was cash-strapped that day. They’re out of Seattle, so it’s likely that they will capture the light of the Pacific Northwest. He tells me that they are still crafted by actual artists, unlike the Windsor Newton and Sennelier paints.

My mother has been painting for 70 years. When she lived in France in the ‘40s, there were different paint companies, each of which captured the light of the country where they were made. Maybe that’s why I’ve liked Windsor Newton so much: the light in Eugene is more like England than France or Italy. All this is another excuse to treat myself to some David Daniels.

Winter has traditionally been the season for me of intricate pen-and-ink, reminiscent of the lacy and skeletal lines and more austere silver-grays of winter. I have drawn lichen-nesses, crumpled leaves, still lives of cyclamen in crystal vases, with attention to the icy facets of the crystal.

In 2002, I started teaching painting, so I needed to bone up—fast--on painting, since I had barely dabbled in painting before then. Fortunately, having studied drawing in college, I already had a strong foundation in composition and drawing. 

The last time I had seriously painted was in high school. My high-school watercolors were a serious attempt at “pigment realism”, where you attempt to match pigment to the color that would come out of an exactly colored photograph. My paintings from back then have a downcast look, with their ochres, olive drabs and tepid blues.

When I was in high school, my mother took me and my siblings to a Matisse cut-out show. I remember a purple tomato that looked redder and juicier, more realistic to me, than anything red I’d ever laid eyes upon. As Matisse, or Picasso (or whoever it was) said apocryphally, “When you cannot use the blue, use the red.” How we perceive color is more than simply an accurate use of pigment, percentage-wise.

All About Green

Green is the most difficult color to capture. Breathing life into our planet and beings, it sparkles the air and glows from the inside. Pigment matching does it no justice. For that very reason, I avoided green for years. A few years ago, while painting in my back yard, I decided to make my peace with it. Perception is contextual and emotional, not just is a subjective impression of a color. I discovered that green contains as many oranges, reds and, especially, purples as pigment greens. This composite green captured this magnificent color perfectly to me, as did the dimensions of the painting, 27” x 40”.

     I used to be intimidated by the perfectionism of watercolor, the seeming necessity to get it right the first time by using perfect technique. For me, technique is a workaround for when I can’t capture what I want, rather than a way to capture it correctly in the first place. All is not lost with those muddly, puddly dead blotches and those watered down tepidities. I have found ways to finesse with various hues of whites. At the risk of appearing cheesy, I sometimes apply iridescent and metallic powders to add luster.

Mary-Minn Sirag at www.kindtree.org

The DSM-V and autism: Mary-Minn's Stim Page, 3-2012

The DSM-V and autism

In May 2013, the American Psychiatric Association will be publishing the DSM-V, an updated version of their Diagnostic Standard Manual (DSM). The DSM describes the criteria that medical professionals use to make a diagnosis. I think there exist additional criteria that are known to everybody else in the autism field––teachers, case managers, care providers, and autists themselves.

I have no formal education in psychology, let alone diagnostics. I embarked on this project only because I was alarmed by what I was reading in the media about the drastic impact the new DSM would have on autists and our community, especially when it comes to getting necessary services.

Fully armed with a mission to alert the autism community and to flout the psychiatric "experts" while I’m at it, I compared the DSM-IV TR (the previous DSM) with the proposed DSM-V, item by item. My findings were reassuringly anti-climactic—maybe just a tad disappointing for this former newspaper reporter, who knows all too well that bad news sells papers.

I read arguments on websites and blogs, and in magazines, trade journals and newspapers about the ramifications of the new DSM on the autism community. I read an opposing argument about the facile intention to write away the "autism epidemic", a creepy locution. Whose facile intention this was, the article did not specify, but my knee-jerk self attributed it to the APA.

I then read an argument by an APA author in favor of eliminating Aspergers, which was that it’s difficult to distinguish between an autist with early speech delays (such as myself) and someone who had no early speech delays. This made sense to me. It seems like an arbitrary distinction, once a person can talk.

When making comparisons, I need to physically check things off, so I printed out the DSM V for Autism, and the DSM-IV TR pages for Autism and for Aspergers. What upset me at first glance was that the physical length of the verbiage in Autism plus Aspergers in the DSM-IV added up to quite a bit more than Autism in the DSM-V, which pointed toward a collapsing of the criteria. Furthermore, diagnosis by the DSM-V required meeting more criteria, hence it appeared to be more restrictive.
Upon reading the criteria more closely, though, I noticed that they were more concretely described and less vague, and that each criterion included more traits, including some that hadn’t even been mentioned in the earlier DSM-IV TR. So the inclusiveness of each criterion made up for the requirement that the patient meet a greater number of the criteria. This spectrum approach brought Aspergers back into the fold.

The DSM-IV TR read more as though it was describing children than adults; whereas, the DSM-V sounded more age-inclusive. The more technical and ever so slightly more archaic style of the earlier DSM had a more sepulchral ring to it, at least to my ears.

What struck me most was that only the DSM-V included sensory processing difficulties, something that is common knowledge in the autism community.

I was also surprised to see no mention of coordination difficulties in either version. Nor did they include difficulties with executive function, which, in my opinion, is the root cause of most of the other difficulties, such as sorting out and tolerating distracting stimuli, self-regulating, tolerating interruptions, making transitions, taking turns, recognizing faces and multi-tasking.

I was pleased to see no mention in either version of the lack of imagination, sense of humor or empathy that I’ve read about in so many other places.

Since the DSM was written with the intention of helping people get treatment for problems ailing them, I was not surprised to find no mention of the positive attributes, such as the Aspergian single-minded focus and prodigious memory for interesting facts, the facility in classifying objects and concepts, the logic-based thinking and inductive reasoning style, the extreme empathy for non-human creatures or people in another age group, the photographic visual memory. No one autist possesses all these gifts but they are a part of our autistic makeup.

Perhaps these super-skills illustrate different types of autism; perhaps, though, these differences have more to do with individual temperament than subtypes of anything. Autism is a mixed bag, coming with deficits and challenges, behavioral traits, and strengths. There are more variations, though, than with other developmental "disorders" in the DSM, leading me to believe that autism is more complex and difficult to define. Describing autism is more like describing a culture than a geographical location.

Mary-Minn Sirag

Ryan Crain as Dean Martin

Ryan: i like old movies that have frank sinatra and dean martin in them and james cargey too.

Melissa: Do you want to write some more about which movies you like, and why they're your favorites?

Ryan: ocean'11 and love me or leave me with james cargey. here is a photo of dean martin:





Here's a video of Ryan:
ryan crain as dean martin

Thoughts...?

Subject: New Definition of Autism Will Exclude Many, Study Suggests

New Definition of Autism Will Exclude Many, Study Suggests
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/01/20/health/research/new-autism-definition-woul
d-exclude-many-study-suggests.html?_r=1&pagewanted=all
Single Page Version


By BENEDICT CAREY
Published: January 19, 2012

 Proposed changes in the definition of autism would sharply reduce the
skyrocketing rate at which the disorder is diagnosed and might make it
harder for many people who would no longer meet the criteria to get health,
educational and social services, a new analysis suggests.

The definition is now being reassessed by an expert panel appointed by the
American Psychiatric Association, which is completing work on the fifth
edition of its Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, the
first major revision in 17 years. The D.S.M., as the manual is known, is
the standard reference for mental disorders, driving research, treatment
and insurance decisions. Most experts expect that the new manual will
narrow the criteria for autism; the question is how sharply.

 The results of the new analysis are preliminary, but they offer the most
drastic estimate of how tightening the criteria for autism could affect the
rate of diagnosis. For years, many experts have privately contended that
the vagueness of the current criteria for autism and related disorders like
Asperger syndrome was contributing to the increase in the rate of diagnoses
- which has ballooned to one child in 100, according to some estimates.

 The psychiatrists' association is wrestling with one of the most
agonizing questions in mental health - where to draw the line between
unusual and abnormal - and its decisions are sure to be wrenching for some
families. At a time when school budgets for special education are
stretched, the new diagnosis could herald more pitched battles. Tens of
thousands of people receive state-backed services to help offset the
disorders' disabling effects, which include sometimes severe learning and
social problems, and the diagnosis is in many ways central to their lives.
Close networks of parents have bonded over common experiences with
children; and the children, too, may grow to find a sense of their own
identity in their struggle with the disorder.

 The proposed changes would probably exclude people with a diagnosis who
were higher functioning. "I'm very concerned about the change in diagnosis,
because I wonder if my daughter would even qualify," said Mary Meyer of
Ramsey, N.J. A diagnosis of Asperger syndrome was crucial to helping her
daughter, who is 37, gain access to services that have helped tremendously.
"She's on disability, which is partly based on the Asperger's; and I'm
hoping to get her into supportive housing, which also depends on her
diagnosis."

 The new analysis, presented Thursday at a meeting of the Icelandic
Medical Association, opens a debate about just how many people the proposed
diagnosis would affect.

 The changes would narrow the diagnosis so much that it could effectively
end the autism surge, said Dr. Fred R. Volkmar, director of the Child Study
Center at the Yale School of Medicine and an author of the new analysis of
the proposal. "We would nip it in the bud."

 Experts working for the Psychiatric Association on the manual's new
definition - a group from which Dr. Volkmar resigned early on - strongly
disagree about the proposed changes' impact. "I don't know how they're
getting those numbers," Catherine Lord, a member of the task force working
on the diagnosis, said about Dr. Volkmar's report.

 Previous projections have concluded that far fewer people would be
excluded under the change, said Dr. Lord, director of the Institute for
Brain Development, a joint project of NewYork-Presbyterian Hospital, Weill
Medical College of Cornell University, Columbia University Medical Center
and the New York Center for Autism.

 Disagreement about the effect of the new definition will almost certainly
increase scrutiny of the finer points of the psychiatric association's
changes to the manual. The revisions are about 90 percent complete and will
be final by December, according to Dr. David J. Kupfer, a professor of
psychiatry at the University of Pittsburgh and chairman of the task force
making the revisions.

 At least a million children and adults have a diagnosis of autism or a
related disorder, like Asperger syndrome or "pervasive developmental
disorder, not otherwise specified," also known as P.D.D.-N.O.S. People with
Asperger's or P.D.D.-N.O.S. endure some of the same social struggles as
those with autism but do not meet the definition for the full-blown
version. The proposed change would consolidate all three diagnoses under
one category, autism spectrum disorder, eliminating Asperger syndrome and
P.D.D.-N.O.S. from the manual. Under the current criteria, a person can
qualify for the diagnosis by exhibiting 6 or more of 12 behaviors; under
the proposed definition, the person would have to exhibit 3 deficits in
social interaction and communication and at least 2 repetitive behaviors, a
much narrower menu.

 Dr. Kupfer said the changes were an attempt to clarify these variations
and put them under one name. Some advocates have been concerned about the
proposed changes.

 "Our fear is that we are going to take a big step backward," said Lori
Shery, president of the Asperger Syndrome Education Network. "If clinicians
say, 'These kids don't fit the criteria for an autism spectrum diagnosis,'
they are not going to get the supports and services they need, and they're
going to experience failure."

 Mark Roithmayr, president of the advocacy organization Autism Speaks,
said that the proposed diagnosis should bring needed clarity but that the
effect it would have on services was not yet clear. "We need to carefully
monitor the impact of these diagnostic changes on access to services and
ensure that no one is being denied the services they need," Mr. Roithmayr
said by e-mail. "Some treatments and services are driven solely by a
person's diagnosis, while other services may depend on other criteria such
as age, I.Q. level or medical history."

 In the new analysis, Dr. Volkmar, along with Brian Reichow and James
McPartland, both at Yale, used data from a large 1993 study that served as
the basis for the current criteria. They focused on 372 children and adults
who were among the highest functioning and found that overall, only 45
percent of them would qualify for the proposed autism spectrum diagnosis
now under review.

 The focus on a high-functioning group may have slightly exaggerated that
percentage, the authors acknowledge. The likelihood of being left out under
the new definition depended on the original diagnosis: about a quarter of
those identified with classic autism in 1993 would not be so identified
under the proposed criteria; about three-quarters of those with Asperger
syndrome would not qualify; and 85 percent of those with P.D.D.-N.O.S.
would not.

 Dr. Volkmar presented the preliminary findings on Thursday. The
researchers will publish a broader analysis, based on a larger and more
representative sample of 1,000 cases, later this year. Dr. Volkmar said
that although the proposed diagnosis would be for disorders on a spectrum
and implies a broader net, it focuses tightly on "classically autistic"
children on the more severe end of the scale. "The major impact here is on
the more cognitively able," he said.

 Dr. Lord said that the study numbers are probably exaggerated because the
research team relied on old data, collected by doctors who were not aware
of what kinds of behaviors the proposed definition requires. "It's not that
the behaviors didn't exist, but that they weren't even asking about them -
they wouldn't show up at all in the data," Dr. Lord said.

 Dr. Volkmar acknowledged as much but said that problems transferring the
data could not account for the large differences in rates.

A couple years ago I adopted a dog (named Kiddo) and wanted to share how much he has helped me. I thought maybe sharing could inspire someone else.

My dog Kiddo pretty much gave me a life, and vice versa- I gave him a life (was out of time at the pound). He opened my world to be able to do a lot of things that I previously had been to afraid to do or didn't want to do because of anxiety or being lonely. These days I can now go to all kinds of parks and go exploring to different places... I am not alone so I feel safer and in good company. I overcame my fear of driving on fast country roads too, because of Kiddo. This means I can drive to other towns now, when before I simply would NOT. I have gotten to see SO so many wonderful places in Oregon since I adopted Kiddo. And I think that going for drives in the country is one of my favorite things to do. We also go for bike rides and go swimming. Before I adopted him I would never go to a restraunt without a person with me, I know it sounds silly but maybe it was because I was anxious or nervous. When I first adopted Kiddo I would sit at outdoor tables at cafes with him and eat and have a nice time. Now when I come to a restraunt that doesn't have outdoor seating I can go inside and sit alone and be ok with that. I guess you could say he has given me more confidence.  I used to always avoid crossing the street at a crosswalk at a busy intersection because I was nervous about people looking at me. But with Kiddo I didn't mind as much walking across the street. Maybe because all the attention wouldn't be on just me. All these changes happened the first month I had him. After adopting Kiddo I guess I realized all the things I had missed out on. I love that boy so much. I feel we are kindered spirits. There are so many personality traits of his that I see in myself. Kind of like he is my son.

I just read this op-ed. Seems to be supporting the more restrictive diagnosis of Aspergers. What do you think?       - Autism Rocks

Asperger's History of Over-diagnosis
by Paul Steinberg

Asperger syndrome and Aspies — the affectionate name that people diagnosed with Asperger syndrome call themselves — seem to be everywhere.

Considered to be at the high-functioning end of the autism spectrum, Asperger syndrome has become more loosely defined in the past 20 years, by both the mental health profession and by lay people, and in many instances is now synonymous with social and interpersonal disabilities. But people with social disabilities are not necessarily autistic, and giving them diagnoses on the autism spectrum often does a real disservice. An expert task force appointed by the American Psychiatric Association is now looking into the possibility of changing the way we diagnose Asperger. True autism reflects major problems with receptive language (the ability to comprehend sounds and words) and with expressive language. Pitch and tone of voice in autism are off-kilter. Language delays are common, and syntactic development is compromised; in addition, there can be repetitive motor movements.

Eventually, biological markers, now in the beginning stages of development, will help in separating autism-spectrum disorders from social disabilities. For example, researchers at the University of Pittsburgh Medical Center have recently developed three-dimensional brain scans that look at brain wiring. In preliminary studies people with autism-spectrum disorders appear to have too much wiring and disorganized wiring in areas involved with language acquisition.

Nevertheless, children and adults with significant interpersonal deficits are being lumped together with children and adults with language acquisition problems. Currently, with the loosening of the diagnosis of Asperger, children and adults who are shy and timid, who have quirky interests like train schedules and baseball statistics, and who have trouble relating to their peers — but who have no language-acquisition problems — are placed on the autism spectrum.

In recent years speculation has abounded that Albert Einstein must have had Asperger syndrome. Christopher Hitchens speculated that his intellectual hero George Orwell must have had Asperger. Indeed, Orwell had major problems fitting in at British preparatory schools — not surprisingly, he hated the totalitarian tenor of teachers and school administrators — but someone on the autism spectrum could probably never have become a police officer in Lower Burma, as Orwell did. Similarly, writers like Charles Morris have noted that Warren Buffett is thought to have a condition on the autism spectrum, presumably Asperger syndrome.

A 1992 United States Department of Education directive contributed to the over-diagnosis of Asperger syndrome. It called for enhanced services for children diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum and for children with “pervasive developmental disorder — not otherwise specified (P.D.D.-N.O.S.),” a diagnosis in which children with social disabilities could be lumped. The diagnosis of Asperger syndrome went through the roof. Curiously, in California, where children with P.D.D.-N.O.S. were not given enhanced services, autism-spectrum diagnoses did not increase. Too little science and too many unintended consequences.

The downside to this diagnosis lies in evidence that children with social disabilities, diagnosed now with an autism-spectrum disorder like Asperger, have lower self-esteem and poorer social development when inappropriately placed in school environments with truly autistic children. In addition, many of us clinicians have seen young adults denied job opportunities, for example in the Peace Corps, when inappropriately given a diagnosis of Asperger syndrome instead of a social disability. George Orwell might never have been able to write his brilliant essay about the shooting of an elephant if Asperger syndrome had been part of his permanent medical record.

Given that humans are social animals, interpersonal intelligence is perhaps the most important natural human skill — as valuable as or more valuable than verbal-linguistic intelligence and logical-mathematical intelligence (to use the terminology of the Harvard psychologist Howard Gardner), the skills focused on in school. Social disabilities are not at all trivial, but they become cheapened by the ubiquity of the Asperger diagnosis, and they become miscast when put in the autism spectrum.

In his 2009 book “Parallel Play,” Tim Page, a former music critic for The Washington Post, describes his relief in being given an Asperger syndrome diagnosis as an adult and thus having an explanation for his longstanding social difficulties. But the rubric of a “social disability” would be more accurate than “autism spectrum” for people like Mr. Page, and potentially just as relieving. In addition, adults and children who have normal expressive and receptive language skills can benefit more fully from social-skills programs than adults and children with true autism. In fact, Tim Page learned a large measure of his social skills from an Emily Post course, just as Warren Buffett credits a Dale Carnegie program with changing his life.

For Mr. Buffett and Mr. Page, these social skills do not come naturally and automatically. But these men are able to compensate more completely than a truly autistic child or adult whose language deficiencies and cognitive deficits can often put him at a level of functioning in the mentally retarded range.

Many people, now inappropriately labeled as Aspies, make the world a richer, more interesting place. Their quirky absorptions in, say, physics, baseball stats or investment strategies add enormously to human advancement. Unlike adults with a Peter Pan syndrome who never move beyond adolescence, children and young adults with significant social disabilities tend to grow quite effectively into their adult lives. Their seriousness and singularity of focus fit more compatibly with the interests of older adults rather than the interests of their childhood or young adult peers.

For better or worse, though, Asperger syndrome has become a part of our cultural landscape. Comments about a person’s having “a touch of Asperger’s” seem to be part of everyday conversations. Even an episode of “South Park” last year was devoted to Asperger syndrome. We can only hope that better physiological markers distinguishing between the autism-spectrum disorders and pure social disabilities can stem this tide of ever more pathologizing.

But, as Martha Denckla, a pediatric neurologist at Johns Hopkins University, has lamented, the only Americans in the future who will perhaps not be labeled as having a touch of Asperger syndrome will be politicians and lobbyists. Members of the political establishment may have other kinds of psychopathology; but, unlike the rest of us, they at least cannot be thought of as Aspies.

Paul Steinberg is a psychiatrist.